Inhofe!

As far as I know, there's no <newman></newman> tag in HTML, or I would've used that. Today, when I went to read the Ironic Times (America's Premier News Source on Mondays), I saw a story headlined "English declared 'national' language". It is sometimes hard for me to tell, in today's world, what in satirical newspapers is completely exaggerated for comic effect, and what is an actual, depressing report on the world today; so I Googled 'English + national language'.

Interestingly, the second hit (after the first, which is a webpage critical of the English-Only Movement) is an Ask Yahoo! question about whether or not the United States has or had an official language, to which the answer is that, no, it never has -- immediately followed by the third hit, a New York Times story about the Senate's voting (as part of the massive Godawful immigration bill) to make English the national language of the United States. (Well, it might seem bad, but fortunately, Alberto Gonzales, who finds the Geneva Conventions "quaint and outdated", reassures us that, "as I read it", the law is purely symbolic -- which, I am forced to ask, begs the question of why are we wasting our time passing useless symbolic laws?) Who, the reader may ask, could author such a singularly feeble-minded piece of legislation? Why, everybody's favourite cute and cuddly Senator James "I'm more outraged by the outrage" Inhofe!